How did I pump out the personal effectiveness skills

How did I pump out the personal effectiveness skills  

Work 24 on 7

"Hello everyone, my name is Anton, and I'm a workaholic. I often work 12 hours a day. My family is very afflicted by this. I really want to start living like all normal people, but every time I break up and sit up late at night "I probably would have started my speech if I had been in the club of anonymous workaholics.
Yes, I really really love my job and spend almost all of my time on it. I work as a technical director in an IT company, I really like the process itself, and even more when I get some visible results.
I was lucky with my second half, my wife supports me and tolerates me. Others in its place would most likely have already rolled up tantrums. Natasha all day sitting alone with the children at home, leads to mugs and a preparatory class senior. We almost never had a full vacation. On weekends, I also often worked, came home late and took work at home.
"I'm all gone, I'm working," I told my people and sat down at the laptop. But the problem is that you can not explain this to the children, they pull your hand, call to play, get upset and cry when you refuse them. It starts to irritate you, because you need to concentrate. Then you take yourself in hand and do a favor to your child, like: "Okay, let's quickly collect your railway", and at the slightest opportunity you try to go back to your work. That is, it turns out, distracted the child and while he sits quietly, run business.
Like most people, I tried to solve pressing problems and tasks that seemed important to me. I thought that I needed to do them right now, and everything else would wait. I'll rest in retirement, the child will cry and cease. "Wife, what do you want from me ?! You see, I'm constantly working and very tired. "
The worst thing is that this life turns into a routine, when you have a job - a house, a house - a job. Man falls into stagnation, and then can go to the stage of degradation. And it is inevitable, because the whole world is changing, and you are standing still.
Perhaps you know? When friends or parents call you and ask: "How are you doing?", And you answer: "Yes, everything is fine, work is a house, a house is a job, in general everything is like everyone else!". And in the evenings you lie in bed, watch Instagram and quietly envy those heroes who rejoice at every day, travel with family to travel, play, play sports, write books. Where do they take so much time? Do not they have 24 hours in a day?
What to do and who is to blame?
Relatively recently, I looked at myself from a different angle. I realized that I'm not really a workaholic, I'm a procrastinator. And I'm sure that most of the so-called workaholics are procrastinators.
Often procrastinators are compared to lazy people, but this is not so, although laziness is one of the reasons for procrastination. I do not spend a whole day lying around on the couch, I just do not know how to properly manage my time, and I always postpone important things for later, tomorrow.
If you look back, then the skills of the procrastinator I spent most of all at the institute, in the hostel. I think this is familiar to many, preparing for the exams on the last night, to the diploma - in the last week. Although I knew such people who were good fellows, and prepared for everything planned. Always envied such people, but at the same time he did nothing to change himself.
Instead of taking and doing, for example splitting the preparation for the exam into small tasks and teaching in small portions, you look at it as one big task and maybe even begin to learn, but you understand that you have a lot to teach and you will not have time today. It is better to start tomorrow early, and today to do something more useful (in fact, more interesting to you) - for example, to learn how to retouch in Photoshop or play a new toy. And so every day Then, when you pass the point of "no return", the point after which you can not change anything any more, you start trying your hardest to do anything. For example, you sit all night and teach these unfortunate tickets, and at 4 or 5 in the morning you realize that you will not have time and start making spurs. In the morning you go to the exam as a zombie, not getting enough sleep, there's emptiness in your head.
For 5 years, you get used to it and it becomes the norm, and then begins the "adult life" and you are already on the rolled track continue to perform all other things in your life.
Then look around, and you're already 3? and maybe more and lucky if you have not yet passed the point of no return and there is still a chance to change everything, or at least make your life better.
It's a bitter truth: when you're doing a routine, you do not have time to look around, analyze, think. You do a similar job day by day and do not see that the world has already changed, and perhaps you no longer need to do it, you need to change the field of activity or carry out modernization. Through this prism you can look absolutely at all the affairs of your life. Try it, look around, think, maybe you can change something now.
Perhaps one of you already, at some point, thought: "Damn, you need to change!", For example, "I'm fat, I need to start going to the rocking chair" - but since we are procrastinators, we are all important and big things, and especially if they can not be measured, postponed for later. Therefore, we say to ourselves: "Everything, from the beginning of the next month, I will definitely start," comes a new month, and we already have a new excuse.
Personally, I can not say about myself that I'm an effective and time management virtuoso. But one thing I can say for sure, I became more effective than was six months ago, and even more effective than a year ago.
It is necessary to understand that the process of becoming effective is a certain function in time, and not some stage after which you say: "I have become effective!" This is a very difficult path and constant work on yourself.
In order to begin to change yourself, you need knowledge and the development of minimum skills. You can, of course, work on yourself as blind kittens who know the world around them, and bang their noses on all obstacles. And you can use the knowledge that has accumulated humanity and try to find and identify the necessary tools that will help in this difficult way.
In general, I believe that knowledge of time management, prioritization of tasks, planning should be given at the institute without fail, and the base should be laid in school.

Do not reinvent the bicycle

When I thought about my behavior with what to begin with, I read the book Getting things Done by David Allen. The main idea of ​​the GTD method, which he was trying to communicate, is to save your mind from remembering the current tasks, you need to write everything down, and not memorize.
GTD method
According to this method, the information received is better divided into several stages of processing:
Any given task or idea should be fixed on any medium, since we have a lot of tools for this today. I tried different: reminders on iOS, ToDoist, Trello, physical diary. I think, here you can not advise a specific tool for everyone, there is no silver bullet, for me Trello and the calendar are best for me.
The processing of the collected information must follow a certain algorithm:
We take the upper element
If it requires actions taking up a bit of time (up to 5 minutes), then immediately do this task or delegate, or postpone if the task requires more time
If the element does not require actions, then we leave it somewhere as reference information, or even throw it away, or transfer it to the list someday /maybe
At this stage, to work on tasks that require further action. David Allen suggests breaking up the tasks into several lists:
The following actions are
Someday /can be
This method did not suit me completely, because I had other problems: I could not set goals, correctly manage time and delegate.
That is, the list of tasks I still had was routine, and often I did not even understand what I should do after I finished the tasks. I was just trying to come up with more tasks, and then more.

Doctor, what's wrong with me?

I realized that I was doing something wrong, I did not get any better, everything was still, only now I was still working on inventing and recording tasks. Tried to find other, more effective options. And one day I realized, I need to watch the times. The problem is that since I'm a procrastinator, I need to get data where I spend my time.
I read about such a technique as timing from Alexander Lyubishchev, but was blown away after a week. I just could not physically force myself to do it all, because the system is designed for a certain type of person: pragmatic, focused, orderly - this is definitely not about me.
The basic principle of technology is to develop a sense of time and feel discomfort when time is wasted not efficiently. The first stage was to simply clock all the actions for more than six weeks without doing anything to change their habits related to the use of time. In other words, everything that happens needs to be written to the so-called time register.
In theory, every day the sense of time should be strengthened and one can learn to distinguish between so-called "slow" and "fast" time, and in time to begin to understand when time "accelerates," learn to slow it down and stay as long as possible in a state of "slow time "and do more tasks. Eventually it becomes quite real to live 2-3 daily "ordinary" days, as Lyubishev himself did.
It seems fantastic, but a very real technique. If there is a desire, try it for someone it will work! Then I read about Lothar Säivert's 10 golden rules. Of these, some have real benefits, I try to apply them in my life.
Intentionally get out and set an unacceptable clock. This rule works well for very important tasks.
If possible, only do the really important things. There is a Pareto principle that says that only 20% of cases are of key importance.
Large tasks in small parts
Set yourself a timeline and priorities
It seems that everything is logical and understandable, but in practice it is very difficult, you are constantly frustrated and begin to procrastinate all the way. The business did not become less: I continued to stay and take work on the house.
Again I'm doing something wrong!


Then I realized that you can not do the task for the sake of the task, but you need to learn how to set goals. It seems that it also looks trivial, but in practice I realized that I do not know how to set goals. And I began to understand how to do it. The methods are a whole darkness, I will not talk about everything, but I'll tell you about those who have approached me.
I liked the principle of goal setting using the SMART method. I think many people have heard of him. It is that the goal should be:
Necessary, reasonable (Realistic)
Clearly defined in time (Timed)
After that, I got an understanding of how to do the tasks now, how to plan. Knowing the goal, you can always make decomposition and understand how to achieve it, what actions need to be taken. From this point you begin to come up with tasks.
It became easier, but there were still many tasks, and the most difficult, you do not always understand when and what task you need to do, and when - no. For example, you are doing some important task, and then someone comes up sharply with their problem, and it's kind of an important task, too. You decide to help and switch, in the end you do not do your task, but performed a completely different one, which was not planned and which in the end turned out to be not mandatory.
And then I came across two methods that I think most influenced me. The first is the Eisenhower Priority Matrix.
When you take a task, you first run through this matrix and you understand whether it is worth it to do or not.
It became better, I started to drive all incoming tasks through this matrix and really began to understand that most of them can either be postponed or delegated, but one question remained open.
My children need attention, my wife - help. I myself - time for sports, reading, rest and time, despite the obvious changes, this is still not enough.

Total planning

And one day I come acrossI went to an article that was an opening for me, and later I read other sources on this topic. The article was about non-traditional methods of modern time management based on the principles of Stephen Covey. It turns out that you can plan not only work! :) Stephen Covey invented the principle of a balance between results, resources and means of achieving them and proposed 6 rules.
Balanced - a harmonious distribution of time to achieve important goals in various spheres of life.
Concentration - spend the most time on "important and non-urgent" cases, since they give the most benefits. And advises to plan not every day, but weekly because it allows you to reserve large periods of time for important, but not urgent matters.
Flexibility - Plans should be comfortable for you, according to your habits, style of work. If necessary, you can easily change the planned, without getting in dependence on the plan prepared earlier.
Humanity - in relations with other people, traditional time management for accuracy in the schedule and subordination. Efficiency is more important than observing rituals. For example: if your communication with a person has gone beyond what was planned, but at the same time helps to establish deep and full relations, one should not feel guilty.
Consistency - the unity between vision and mission, roles and goals, priorities and plans, desires and discipline.
Compactness - Tools should be as compact and convenient as possible Summing up the first thing you need to understand, time management is not just a technical skill, it is based on the ability to understand your own values ​​(work, family, health), set goals and set priorities.

A few words about the absorbers of time

Performing unnecessary cases
The Eisenhower Matrix is ​​your help.
Execution of other people's obligations
Do something that someone else must do, sometimes very exciting. Especially when you are professionally strong in this matter.
Irrational waste of time
You spend more time on work than you need. Are not organized, you consider the task difficult. There is simply no information, you start acting swiftly and without thinking. Trying to do everything yourself.
The waste of someone else's time
We give useful thoughts "after", when the man has already done most of the work
We forget to share new information, the performers are working with outdated data
Please help in something while not providing enough information
We allow ourselves to lyrical digressions, because of which the discussions become excessively lengthy
We force punctual people to wait, being late for the meeting

What in the end?

I still still procrastinate, but thanks to these techniques and constant work on myself, I do it much less, I have more time. There is one more secret: I found myself a friend-colleague, with whom we are working together and do not let each other get involved in the garbage. At home, I connected my beloved wife on the same principle, although it turns out that it is much worse and I still sometimes halyavlyu in household chores. I started to go in for sports, again liffak - together with my colleague I chose a convenient time for this, and together we go to the gym and at the same time we hold brainstorms. Then we come to the office and are engaged in the realization of invented ideas or the necessary routine.
Yes, sometimes I am working on the business I started, like writing this article, but much, much less. I clearly try to divide the house and work, although being a co-founder of my own favorite business, this is simply impossible, since work is also my home.
I plan to improve my time management skills, to try new techniques or other combinations, to invent lifhaki. As mentioned above, this is an endless process of working on yourself, as soon as you stop, then quickly roll back into stagnation and degradation.
My goal is to learn how to manage my tasks in such a way that I have enough time to calmly engage in new ideas and directions, and also to have a rest with my family twice a year.
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